My husband Charlie was invited to go on an “all guys weekend” to Rocky Point, Mexico by our neighbors. So, one of the wife’s of this group of neighbors decided that the women left behind should go to the movies, call it a mini-girl’s night out.

The trouble with this particular neighbor is that she has this uncanny ability to pick really sad movies. The last time I went with her, we saw Reign Over Me with Adam Sandler. I thought I was going to a comedy and ended up crying for a week. I came home in tears and my poor husband said, “I really wanted you to have a good time.” Between the sobs, I replied, “Oh, but I did.”

Reign Over Me is about a man who lost his family in the 9/11 attacks on New York City and is working through his grief issues; he lost his wife and three daughters. It’s one of those movies that opens up your wounds and makes you feel his loss.

My neighbor, that invites me to see these sad movies, also has this bizarre sense of timing. Right when I’m holding my breath, trying not to fully sob and draw attention to myself… see leans forward in her seat and looks down the aisle to see who can’t keep it together. She’ll make eye contact with you and then nod and smile, as if to say, I knew you would be the one that would cry hard in movies. It’s like you are totally busted!

So, when my neighbor asked me if I wanted to go see a movie while the guys were out of town, I said, “Sure, but it has to be funny.” I didn’t tell her why; I just said that we needed to go see a comedy, nothing sad.

She totally baited and switched on me and we ended up seeing The Duchess. Of course, I cried when Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire gives her baby to the family of Earl Grey, because that’s the decision the Duke makes. And that’s exactly the time my neighbor looks down the aisle to see who is crying. I got the smile and nod.

It’s a good thing my husband was far away fishing with the men after seeing The Duchess. It brought up so many women issues and how unfair women were treated in the late 18th century, when Georgiana lived. If I had been Georgiana, I would have poisoned the Duke or something. I would never allow a man to make that kind of decision on my behalf.

After the movie let out, we discussed the movie briefly, because we were all tired and we knew the kids would be up at the crack of dawn, 5:45 AM to be exact. I tell the group of women, who all have children, how I feel … that I would never let a man come between my children, and me no matter who the father was.

And the same neighbor says, “Nothing has changed over all of these years. Men are still making the decisions.”

Not much was said after that. I’ve been thinking about what the neighbor said and the movie all day. It might not be a baby, but as a mom and a wife, I can admit that I have given up things that were important to me, but so has my husband. Being in relationships and knowing when to compromise is difficult. Even harder, though, is standing up for your rights or what you believe in.

I love when a movie makes you stop and think. And, I really don’t mind that my neighbor knows that I cry. In fact, I believe I saw tears flowing down her cheeks as well.